Volunteering

So today was my first day to volunteer at the health clinic. I learned a few things.

1-bring your own pen.
2- people who come to health clinics are called patients, not clients.
3- if you push the button on the thermometer (to activate), it eventually beeps, which means that it has actually recorded a temperature. If you don't push the button, everyone's temperature is 97.2 and you look like a real idiot.
4-you don't have to speak Spanish to know that the 3 year old who is screaming at you isn't going to let you take her temperature.
5-when you pop the plastic ear cover off the thermometer, its cool if you can make a long shot into the wastebasket. If the patient is under 10 years old, you can get a million dollar giggle if you miss it by a mile.
6-a smile is worth a thousand words and gesturing is entertaining, but sometimes it just works better if you go get the interpreter.
7-the PA admissions committee was right, I wasn't ready. I have a lot to learn.

Pause

Amy's blog about her annual reflection got me thinking about my efforts to get into PA school. I realized I had a list of my own.

1-Chemistry is as hard as everyone says it is, BUT hard doesn't mean impossible and I actually like it and may (MAY) be kinda good at it .

2- Just because I'm busy and trying to do too much, is not an excuse for not being prepared. Walking into a prospective PA school without knowing their mission statement cold, is foolish. Period. What was I thinking?

3- No more black business blazers and stiff white (ugly) dress shirts from Express. I was trying to be who I thought they wanted. (they being the Head of Admissions). The next face to face encounter, I will be wearing something from Anthropology.

4- I periodically feel ridiculous for not just settling down with the life I've created and just cruise it until the end. But I don't believe the "end" is really the end and cruising for 40 more years sounds really boring.

5- I don't really know if I must be a PA or not. What I do know it that I must serve the world's children and that I don't have enough education or resources to do it. Becoming a PA just makes sense. If there is an alternative, I'm listening....

6- "Without sufficient sacrifice, winning isn't meaningful and losing doesn't hurt" (Words off of the back of a really cool t-shirt). Last application cycle I had a dream. I worked hard in that dream, but there was still a fair share of glittery illusion in the background. This year there is nothing dream like about it. I'm tired, dinged up and my ego terribly bruised. It feels very real. Real is better.

Elimination Reaction

Dear Organic Chemistry,
Its true. I loved you once. Back at the beginning. But now I think it may have actually just been infatuation. You were bright and engaging and challenging. There was such a rush when I would finally break through and understand your language and see your world.

But over that last one million hours of being your constant companion, I'm sad to say that the love is dying. I really want you to quit talking, stop making exceptions for all of your rules and quit cramming your postulates down my throat. I told you I didn't like to cook, yet you insist that I synthesis epoxides, alkenes, nucleophiles and alcohol (of all things)! I am in such a jumble I no longer know what is appropriate....do I flip it, hydrate it, reduce it or hydrogenate it?
Lately, I catch myself just staring at it. Yes, it is definitely time to part ways. Today would be good.

After weeks of recovery, its possible I will miss you. I may long for the engaging conversations and the convoluted way you organize and re-organize yourself. I may pine away for the mechanisms you taught me that I can no longer recall. But right now all I feel is burned out. You are exhausting. Good by. Please go away.

One Breathless Ballerina Moment

Staring right into the eyes of the dream you've been cradling in your heart since forever. You only get a handful of those in a lifetime. They ought to be treasured.

Traditions

So I've had enough of the yearly comments made by my children under their breath (and over their breath) about how we don't have any Christmas traditions in our family.

Now I could argue that. (There has always been a Christmas tree, Scott.)

But then again, growing up, they had to be flexible with their holidays as they shuttled back and forth between parents and adapted to a blended family. Maybe their point is valid.

This is the year it's gonna change. There will be TRADITIONS.

New socks on Christmas Eve. From now until the day I die, each one will open a present on Christmas Eve that will contain a new pair of socks. Everyone will have happy feet.

A pickle in the Christmas tree. That's right. A pickle. It is a Norwegian tradition (from what I've heard). I'm adopting it. The pickle is hidden in the tree and there is a treat for every girl and boy who can find it :-)

And lastly, there will be music. Jingle Bells and other tunes played on wrapping paper tubes. Those lovely cardboard instruments resonate a fabulous tone when whacked on one's own (or someone else's) head.

Everyone should have a few traditions tucked in their heart pocket as they go through life. I hope I'm not too late. Merry Christmas to all.

Slugs, Snails, Puppy dog tails

Does every boy need a dog?

Or is it that every dog needs a boy?

Driving the Dream

So I didn't get an interview with University of Utah. It knocked the wind out of me for a moment. Then I realized. That first rejection letter is like getting the first dent in your car. It's a big deal. All of the subsequent dings, however, are barely mentionable.

So it will be with getting into PA school.

The first dent. Done.

Now I can refocus on driving. I'm sure there will be a few more dings along the way, but they will be more inconvenient, than upsetting. As long as the car still drives, I'm still in the game. For as long as it takes.